Modern Nursery Rhymes: #82 The Battle of Prestonpans, 2010

Little Ms Moffat,
Sat at great profit,
Going first-class all the way.
The locals decried her,
Not knowing, as they fried her,
They'd soon be stuck with Iain Gray!

A "major" pain

A good post over at Moridura. I agree with most of it, but I might just have made the following tiny but important amendment - quotation marks around the use of that old saw "major parties". The casual observer of politics is constantly told about "the major parties" - no wonder they so rarely vote for anyone else! After all, why vote for a "minor party" in a first-past-the-post (FPTP) system? What sort of stupid choice would that be?! Duh!

You can have any colour you like, as long as it's blue. Or red.

Only two valid choices for you, little voter,
The fate of us all in the hands of these floaters.
Labour or Tory, Tory or Labour?
Empty blue boaters, or reds rattling sabers?

Labour or Tory, long to reign over us!
Don't try to fight it, change is too onerous.
The "minor parties" must never win,
Little voter 'twas ever thus, just give in.

No prospect of change, no hope for the future,
Democracy stitched up with red and blue sutures.
Forty percent, a resounding majority!
(The sixty percent deprived of authority)

Labour the winners! Even if they lose,
Tories the winners! Even if they lose,
Give in little voter, snooze, snooze,
Don't bother to vote, you don't get to choose.
Snooze, snooze, snooze, snooze,
Snooze, snooze, snooze, snooze...

But enough cynicism! Why vote for a "minor party" at Westminster? Well, because change does happen, even if only occasionally under the anti-democracy of FPTP: sitting MPs, ministers and governments do get turfed out; Liberal parties reign supreme then wither away; Labour parties spring up; SDP's rise ("I feel a surge David!") and fall; and of course "minor parties" like the SNP and Plaid Cymru rise and impinge on the "natural parties of government".

Overuse of phrases such as "major parties" unthinkingly (and sometimes thinkingly!) serves to prevent these kind of changes, the very lifeblood of democracy, from happening. And by subtly denying the possibility of alternatives in this way, we are led to the current sorry state of affairs in which only a small gaggle of die-hards will actually be voting for the Labour or Tory parties. Most of the electorate will actually be voting against one or other of them: either "we can't let Labour continue, remember the last 13 years", or "we can't let the Tories back in, I remember the last lot". No wonder people are disillusioned with Westminster politics.

Fortunately the solution to this mess is simple. Contrast the vibrancy of elections to the Scottish parliament and the moribundity of the Westminster elections. The difference is proportional representation (PR). The difference is genuine competition for every vote, a genuine opportunity for different political viewpoints to be represented and a genuine chance for change. Genuine democracy you might say.

Neither of the "main parties" want to bring PR to Westminster, Turkeys voting for Christmas and all that. So if it's change you want, vote for a "minor party" committed to PR for Westminster. In a hung parliament the "minor parties" might not be so minor after all.

101 uses for Iain Gray: #72 Cartographer Royal

Did my eyes and ears deceive me yesterday dear reader? Iain Gray, digging ever deeper, like a hyperactive mole on steroids late for an appointment at the optician (ok, with hindsight perhaps I spent too long listening to Bill McLaren clips), attempts to land a blow on Republican Rose and Wee Eck with this abject non-story about the Balmoral footpaths. Jings, crivvens, help ma Boab! What a scandalous dereliction of duty by those SNP ne'er-do-wells! The outrage was palpable, palpably desperate. Right to roam? Gray seems more interested in his right to drone.

Worth a mention in passing is the Daily Telegraph's headline writer - clearly feeling that "Republican" was insufficiently bilious they plumped instead for the positively poisonous "Antimonarchist" in Simon Johnson's article. Even here in Brigadoon I could hear the loyal subjects of Tunbridge Wells spitting their Darjeeling out.

In memory of Bill McLaren

What sad news to hear of Bill McLaren passing away. He was one of those commentators that was synonymous with his sport, meticulous in his preparation, superbly informed, a wonderful voice and a gift for adding to the spectacle. The Voice of Rugby they called him, and for me and many others he certainly was that. When I jumped about in the mud as a young loon, pretending to score the winning try for Scotland in the World Cup final, it was Bill McLaren's voice I heard in my head describing the triumph. And if and when I reach his venerable age, I suspect it will still be Bill's voice I hear when I dream about scoring that winning try (mud jumping will likely be beyond me by then!).

Bill in his element (photo from the Herald)

The BBC have a nice compilation of some of his memorable moments here: Bill McLaren's greatest hits. It's always sad when we lose such a great man, but what a privilege to have listened to him all these years.

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Poll results: Who would best replace Brown?

Who would best replace Brown?

Lord Mandy 5 votes (13%)
David Miliband 0 (0%)
Jack Straw 4 (11%)
Harriet Harperson 2 (5%)
Alan Johnson 3 (8%)
James Purnell 4 (11%)
Ed Balls 1 (3%)
Jim Murphy 1 (3%)
Alastair Darling 1 (3%)
Other 15 (43%)

Thanks to one and all for your votes. Looks like an utter lack of endorsement for any of the main contenders. The polls at the weekend tend to show a drift towards the Tories, though not dramatically so.

Will Labour have a long wait before they return to electability, like the Tories after '97? I'm not so sure - the weakness of the economy will give the Tories a very short honeymoon. If Labour are smart they'll have a good dose of bloodletting after the election, remove as much dead wood and clear the way for a new generation as soon as possible. Once the cuts start to bite in the next parliament they'll at least have the opportunity to capitalise on any discontent with the Tories. Whether they can ever hope to reconnect with Middle England to the extent that Blair did is very doubtful though.