Tuesday, 10 March 2009

GB Tips

Exciting news from Sweden that chimps are capable of foresight and planning. In Furuvik zoo a chimp collects stones in the early morning, ready to throw at gawping visitors later in the day. This shock revelation overturns the last decade of chimp research.

Previous evidence had indicated the Bushy chimp to be incapable of considering events more than 45 minutes into the future. This deficiency often led the Bushy chimp into quagmires from which escape was impossible, even with the help of its symbiotic poodle.

Similarly the lesser Brown chimp was demonstrated to gorge with bacchanalian abandon during times of plenty, causing great bloating in the process, yet storing insufficient resources to see itself through more turbulent times.

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